It is a challenge to maintain the diametrically opposed identities of “laziest person ever” and “enthusiastic cyclist/eager adventurer.” Thankfully, I have sorted out a system to neatly integrate these two using this special step-by-step guide to lazy microadventuring.
Step 1: Prepare to adventure. Take off your fluffy dressing gown and cozy slippers and put on some adventure clothes. Ideally, find a balance between performance-gear and excessive comfort, so you can continue to maintain your bra-less weekend rule (perhaps not relevant to all readers, but certainly a priority for me).
Step 2: Pack your fanny pack/bum bag/sac banane. This is not the sort of day that will require fully packed panniers. A snack, notebook, photo-taking device, and credit card are pretty much all you will need.
Step 3: Leave the house. I warn you, this is the most unpleasant stage and it may take several hours, multiple cups of coffee, watching inspirational youtube videos of people doing impressive things (like this) before this step is complete.
Step 4: Pick a steeple, hill, tall tree, or other feature in the distance. I am lucky to live in London where there is an embarrassment of old churches, statuesque historic buildings, and other accoutrement to choose from.
Step 5: Head vaguely in that direction. Note: it is fully acceptable and even encouraged to avoid all roads ending in “hill” “cliff” or “mount”. The conveniently may add interesting detours to your route as you meander around lung-busting hills.
Step 6: Smile excessively. Maintain a moderate level of lostness.
Step 7: Arrive at previously established destination. Snap a selfie, eat a snack, and marvel at the warmth of the sun on your face.
Step 8: Point yourself in the general direction of a coffee shop and drink beautiful cups of coffee. (Today’s destination: The Spoke).
Step 9: Wander home. If you are “lucky” like me to live in in a house perched on the top of a giant hill, you will have one opportunity to showcase your fierce athleticism by propelling your body up the hill in one final push to the finish. Mentally congratulate yourself for being such a good adventurer.
Step 10: Nap. After all, you [kinda] earned it!
Happy Sunday, lovelies! ❤